Close Encounters and Premeditated Murder

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The desert heat can bring out some strange and creepy critters.  I find myself constantly on the lookout for desert creepers such as Scorpions, Centipedes, Tarantulas, and other nasty bugs. 

What I wasn’t expecting were these alien-like creatures which appeared on my front porch a couple nights ago.

Each about 3 inches long – 4 or 5 inches if you include the length of those antanae, these wierdos scared the crap out of me as I noticed them just before I sat down on the wooden bench.  They had pinchers, and no fear. 

Being a typical woman in some respects, these bugs had me thouroughly freaked out and I knew I would not be able to sleep knowing they were outside my door.   I was sure they were plotting a break in.  Getting rid of them involved some planning.  Murdering aliens is not always a crime of passion… this one was certainly premeditated.  I found the bug spray.  The huge bottle from Home Depot with the pump in the handle for the steady stream.  I sprayed and sprayed.  One ran up the window screen and the other ran down the leg of the wooden bench.  They moved their antenae around ferociously, I swear they were sending out radio waves, calling the Mother Ship.  Once I was sure they were stunned by the spray, I knocked them each onto the sidewalk with the broom, where they met their destiny under the heavy solid part of the bottle of bug spray.

I went back inside, satisfied yet disgusted and feeling somewhat guilty.  After all, they probably wouldn’t have harmed me.  Then again, they looked like they would have enjoyed munching on my skin, or laying eggs under my kitchen sink. 

I showed the picture to a friend, who agreed, they most definatley look Alien.  She suggested that I call the White House.  I told her, too late, I already killed them and disposed of the bodies.  Besides, the Government probably would have called me a racist, accused me of racial profiling, and then sued me for not welcoming the aliens into my home and offering them free food.


Monsoon Meandering


I haven’t slept in my bedroom since last Thursday.  In fact, all three bedrooms in this house have gone un-used and virtually un-inhabited for the past 4 days, with no end in sight.  We’ve all been sleeping on the floor in the office.  That’s where the Air Conditioner is.  The rest of the house doesn’t have A/C, just a swamp cooler (Evaporative Cooler)  The swamp cooler was working pretty good up until this month, when the humidity started to rise.   What we consider humidity here is anything above 20% – which normally would be bearable, but without an A/C it is proving to be quite miserable, as the Evap. Coolers don’t work when the water can’t evaporate.

July and August are called “Monsoon Season” in phoenix, because the humidity and dew point rise and there is a chance of thunderstorms.  Sometimes these storms can be severe, but we haven’t seen anything like that yet… just sweltering heat in the triple digits.

The office, a small room in the back of the house with a large wall unit A/C has turned into our sanctuary.   Thankfully, this is the room with a couch, a tv, and the computer. 

Last night I woke up to a rumbling sound.  At first I thought it must be someone’s loud engine running somewhere down the street.  But as I lay there, the room brightened with a brief flash of light and then another rumble was heard.  Thunder.  I got up and walked into the hot part of the house, to the front door.  I could smell the rain before I opened the door.  It was still warm, but the rain was cooling the air a bit, and it was slightly cooler outside than it was inside my house.  So I opened the front and back doors, and moved the fans in front of them.  It was 2:30 am, and here in South West Phoenix I wasn’t sure I wanted to go back to bed with the doors wide open.  So I stayed up for an hour, letting the fans move the cooler air into the house, pushing out some of the stuffy air that had been accumulating in the kitchen and front entrance.  I stood in the rain in my pajamas and felt relieved.  I knew the relief wouldn’t last long.  Eventually, around 3:30, I reluctantly closed the doors and went back into the air-conditioned office and tried to get some more sleep.  My back and hips are starting to complain from sleeping on the floor for 4 nights, but it feels so much cooler in here that I really don’t care.

Now it’s 11:00 am.  The sun is shining and the temperature has already risen to 100 degrees, with the humidity at 32%.  I don’t know if having the doors opened last night helped the temperature in the rest of the house – it’s still too hot to comfortably make use of any room other than this one.  The rain we had was much needed, and I am thankful for it, but the light sprinkle in the middle of the night won’t do much other than make it more muggy and humid the rest of the week. 

I just wish we would have some of those insane torrential thunderstorms and then have this monsoon season pass us by.  If the humidity clears out, I may be able to use the rest of my house.  For now, it’s a matter of staying in this room as long as possible, and if I must go in the other rooms to clean or cook, I will wear wet clothes, wet hair, and try not to work for longer than 15 minutes at a time.